Ellie loves her blanky!!

Ellies play date =D

this is ellie and eli (elis 3 months older)

REEEACH!

sooo my smart baby girl reached for ger toy and grabbed it and held onto it aaall by herself! im so proud of her shes so smart =D 8 weeks old tomorrow!

Walk with cousins =D

Ellie loves the outdoors! and i love that she has so many cousins around her age! this was a couple weeks ago ive been procrastinating =X

Water Safari, Family Reunion anddd Camping!

Ellie was soooo good she LOVED camping, mezmorized by the tress and so smiley as always =) but heres some updated pictures

goodnght

crazy dreams!

So...to those of you who've been following and read my blog from the beginning, you know that I had a dream after trying for a while to get pregnant with Ellie, that I was going to get pregnant with a baby girl and what to name her etc...then a month later I found out I was pregnant......Well, with that said I now don't brush dreams off just because I "want it so bad" yadda yadda. I'll write out the dream i had a few days ago but this one wasn't as straight foward as the one about Ellie so it could be nothing =)

I was with my mom in her van with Ellie in the back seat and driving in front of us was my brother, hubby and our baby boy Joshua (no we don't have a baby other than ellie for right now lol) Anyways oddly my mom decided to drive over the car josh ty and ellie were in like how monster trucks can just drive over cars lol. Anywho, I freaked out and got mad at my mom because she just ran over the car that my son was in (didnt crush the car) and strangely enough his car seat was attatched to the front bumoper of the car (probably because my brother was driving, so with him driving thats equivalent to him being strapped to the front of the car lol) anyways we pulled over and then ellie ended up waking me up to eat and i looked for Joshua to check on him (i was still half asleep) until i realized I had no son LOL

    When I fell back to sleep after feeding Ellie I had ANOTHER dream.....I went into my dr's office and the nurse came in saying how important it was NOT to get pregnant so soon and that my body could not handle it etc. etc. but in my dream I was scared and upset because I knew I was already pregnant and as I left I saw one of my cousins who told me she was there to get rid of an infection then gonna start trying for another baby so our babies will be close in age (obviously she knew i was pregnant in this dream)

THEN THE NEXT DAY I HAD ANOTHER DREAM I was in the same dr's office in labor and josh told me he could see our sons head and I said good one more push and the butt will be out LOL. Then I was holding my baby boy and said "Hes bigger than his sister and I pushed him out just fine" t(as most of you know I had to have a csection cause ellie got stuck behind my pelvic bone and was not coming out due to being 9 1/2 lbs)


Sooooooooo I'm not sure where in the world these dreams came from, if my hormones are just crazy still or dropping too quickly or what not but I decided to share them =) I've been nauseous every day since last week, also tired (but i hear that comes with being a mom) and a few other weird things but it could be from sleepless nights and stressful days. But mannnn would that be crazy to be pregnant again!! I'm not so sure how I'd feel about that, probably worried about another cesction and how my body would handle the stress but that'd probably be my biggest fear. Oh well just felt like sharing =)

Just a mom

does anyone else feel like they lost the "romance"?? I sure do! I feel like all i am is ellies mom lately, I've even dressed up cute I do my hair and make up and what not. It just seems like all I do is feed, change diapers, clean the house and MAYBE get a quick shower in while ellie sits in her swing in the bathroom. I'm not sure if me becoming mommy has altered friends, family and even hubbys view of me, but it seems like i can only be mom, not sexy wife, or best friend to talk to, or anything worth impressing. I know i chose this and I love my baby girl sooo much but I would love to feel like more than just mommy right now and i just dont see that happening

There are a few words that I don't know the meaning to anymore....sleep, shower, hot meal etc...catch my drift? although the word tired and I have become very close. I thought I was getting used to having no sleep but I'm pretty sure my body was just accumulating all the sleepless nights just to have it all crash on me now. My eyes almost don't want to stay open through out the whole day and yes I try to nap when she naps but for some reason her naps are getting shorter and shorter while my house gets messier and messier! Not to mention its rained the past couple days and stupid me didn't have time to do laundry while it was nice all weekend so i am officially panty-less! (we need a converter thing for our dryer because the plus is 2 prong and the dryer is 3 or whatever) All this tiredness may be why my stomach has been so off lately, my appetite has just got up and walked out on me and when I try to eat it seems like food wants to come right back up as well. I guess today is my day to throw a pity party and have a vent post =P.
  On the plus side, joshs parents called and are taking us to dinner tonight woohooo, pumped a bottle changed ellie 4 TIMES she'll only poop in a clean diaper, even if that means changing her 3 times in a row lol and got everything ready soooo off to dinner i go now, heres to hoping the car ride puts her into a deep sleep so we enjoy our meal =D

Pregnant Dance 38 weeks

soo this COULD be extremely embarrassing but i could care less what people think i had fun!! LOL

the many faces of ellie

Luellas first roll from belly to back!! 6 weeks and 2 days old

my baby girl hates tummy time for some reason so she was very determined to learn how to roll and today she did =D and i got it on camera!! she rolled 3 times for me!!! as you can tell from the video i was overly excited!

6 weeks postpartum!

1 month post partum

still got the baby pouch but its slowly going away =) about 10 lbs till im back to pre preggo weight. josh and i have been going on walks up hill every day (didnt get the clear from my dr yet but i havent been over doing it too much i dont think) and weve cut out all junk food, switched things like potato chips to dried banana chips, light mayo, wheat bread and not adding salt even when its called for in recipes. just some small food differences and not over eating as well oooh and loots of water! hopefully ill be back to regular size for one of my best friends wedding in october (im sure i will be =D

CORD FELL OFF AND UPDATES

Public health nurse came today, Ellie is weighing in at 11lb 4oz 23 inches long =D she's doing great. Her cord was hanging by a thread so the nurse just pulled it off and man was i relieved!!! Tonight was her first bath and she loved it soooo much! She's been asleep for a couple hours now but i can tell its a deep sleep. She can go in the water now Im sooo excited. We're planning on going to water safari in a couple weeks and I'll be able to sit in the kiddie pool with her =D
The fair was all week long and we used our carrier...SOOO much easier than a stroller and she loved it and slept in it the whole time. I suggest everyone get a carrier.
Josh has been back to work so it's just been Ellie and I and it's taking some getting used to. He's just sooo supportive and helpful its weird not having him around all day anymore but its also nice having some money again =) OH AND WE GOT A CAR!! Life is going really well right now and we love our baby girl sooo much. Her dedication was last Sunday and it was so beautiful.
sorry this post is so scattered but I'm just trying to add in all the little updates so I can get off here
Goodnight all

Mastitis

Soo last Monday the 18th i went to bed with my boob slightly hurting, i thought maybe ellie needed to eat and they were just full but i wasnt engorged or anything. The next morning i woke up feeling like I had the flu, my whole body ached, and I had a temp of 101 and a red painful spot on my left boob and sure enough was the very beginning of mastitis. I went to the dr that day at 2 and she put me on antibiotics which i will say i only took for 3 days rather than the 7...yes i know they say take the full dose so it doesnt come back, well it gave ellie really bad diarrhea and my dr said it was just the start, i wasnt in excrusiating pain and the clogged milk duct wasnt too clogged yet so hopefully i took enough because as it is ellies been eating less (in my opinion) i dont want her dehydrated. I could have gotten the clogged duct from her eating less that night we cold turkey stopped the nipple shield or from the 2 sizes too small bra i wore the day before who knows but it SUCKED so hopefully it doesnt come back and if it does i have the antibiotics ready =) Good news, ellie went to the mall, church and store, out alll day and she did sooo well I was soo excited

SHE LATCHED

Saturday july 16th we went to a prayer meeting at our church and of course i had the stupid nipple shield in my bag because she was stillll not nursing without it!! well we get home that night and as always ellie is hungry, i reach into my diaper bag and guess what WASNT in there?!?! that friggen nipple shield...i PANICKED!! I picked ellie up and put her to my boob and she tried soo hard to latch but was just upsetting herself more and more because she wasnt used to no nipple shield which in turn upset me and i cried and just broke down because there was no way to get it in the middle of the night. Josh calmed me down and took her and calmed her down and we tried again, she sucked a little then whined sucked a little then whined never fully latching and it was breaking my heart that my poor baby was starving but she finally just fell asleep on my boob...2 hours later she wakes up hungry again so we try again and the whole process all over again she starts screaming and this went on all night long having to calm her down and try over and over but this time i pumped so when we were done trying i gave her a bottle just so she wouldnt starve and finally at 7 in the morning she latched!! and ate for a looong time, through out the next day it was still a little hard to get her to latch but she was doing better and better and now i can breastfeed ANYWHERE without the shield...im not sure why but she still has trouble latching on the right side and wont eat a lot from that side and ever since we quit the nipple shield i feel like she eats less, maybe because she isnt pacifying herslef as much i dont know but she is gaining weight still so i guess at her 2 month check up well see what the dr says

so we skipped right over weening her and just quit cold turkey...hardest night of my life but sooo worth it now

she can roll!!!

ok so this picture was taken at 2 weeks old she was rolling from her back to her side!!! i know its not rolling completely but shes just sooo strong she holds her head up and everything i love it, thats what i get for having a 9 1/2 pounder hehehe its the breast milk and vitamins i swear

newborn photo shoot and others

my friend stephanie did these

i took this hehehe shes so happy in the mornings i dont care what they say theres no way its gas when its in response to my voice lol

and my friend kelsey took these