LONGEST NIGHT EVERRR!! contractions......

so last night at about 830 i started having irregular but very painful contractions that started in the back and by 11 they were wrapped around from my back to my lower stomach into my hips and thighs and even butt.
they were very regular by 11 at about 3-4 minutes apart aaalll niiighttt longgg!! i was waiting for them to get closer or even a little more intense before i went to l&d so that i wouldnt be stuck there then sent home. now i am regretting not going in, they were soooo painful!!! when i was laying down or switched positions they hurt more, the shower helped a little and sitting made them let up a lot which didnt make sense to me. They were consistent and strong right up until 430 and then they just stopped!!! I was sooo mad I went through all that pain and still not holding my baby girl!! I couldnt even talk through them they hurt so bad, but i guess these clusters of contractions that slowly dilate me are better than just hard core hours on end labor. i talked to a few people who said they had to have their water broken before they could progress past 3cm and then some one else said it may be that her head is too big, so i guess ill wait and see at my apt on monday. any and all prayers are very much appreciated, this is so emotionally and physically exhausting and i really wish I would have just went in and had them break my water!  but God has a day for her to be born and Im patiently waiting trying to pass time
today josh and i took a hike down to the river then went to sand pond and then i made pie and we had a fire after so it was a very nice day just the 2 of us =D
Tomorrow is fathers day and I wish i had a baby girl to give him as his gift but Im pretty sure shell be coming on the 22nd (grandma mooneys birthday) like we prayed so hard for in the beginning
thats all the updated for now,,,,

Labor and Delivery!!! oh yeah anddd how the sono went

so monday as you all saw in the last post i had a very nice dr apt, well the next morning i woke up with braxton hicks, they werent very strong so i went to my sono, the sono tech couldnt even see her face cause it was too far down I was soo upset but then again i was excited to know shell be in our arms soon. soon after that i started having mild contractions which in turn turned into regular stronger contractions, so jeri and mom bailey convinced me to go in just to get checked, brought the hospital bag just in case but left it in the truck. I get in there and sure enough contractions are 8 mins apart but reading at only 60 and lasting 30 seconds well they decided to keep me over night and admit me, around say maybe 1 contractions got to 1 minute apart, very intense and lasting about 1 minute in length. then shortly after they just STOPPED!! dr came in at 10 a.m and checked me about 3 1/2 cm and went from 70 to 80% effaced and from stage -2 to stage -1. i was in back labor and cervix is posterior causing contractions not to be as effective so i got sent home to walk and get things moving, still having constant contractions but not very strong so i guess well see im in early labor so hopefully things speed up shes been gradually getting lower and loads of pressure hopefully i wake up to my water broken, thats what im really praying for!!! heres some picturess

38 week dr apt!!!!

So i asked my dr to check me cause i had those contractions in albany and i was just curious if i was profressing at all, in turn my dr said yes ill check you but i wouldnt get my hopes up, with your first you usually go over a week or two. So she then checks me and says"OH, you wont be going over!" IM 3 CM DILATED AND 70% EFFACED!! she said she cant believe im even walking with how low her head is!!! also said she thinks i could go tomorrow and probably wont be making it to my next apt LOL Ive been sooo giddy ever since!!! The dr said when she hit 3 cm she went the next day so all night ive been bouncing on my exercise ball and walking around the house and cleaning and what not cause its been pooring rain out so i wasnt able to go on a nice hike but oh well =D I have a sono tomorrow at 1 so either way i get to see my baby girl hehe hopefully shes progressing really well and moving along, i cant wait to meet her!!! I had a freak out moment for a minute, its just NOW hitting me! IM GONNA BE A MOM!!! I was a little worried about labor but im not anymore since im already effacing and dilating it should be a fairly easy and quick labor which sounds about right since its been such an easy and quick pregnancy!! I cant believe this is all happening...
some symptoms im having that labor is near
LOST MY MUCUS PLUG!! it was like tannish brown and looked like snot (for all you squeemish im pretty sure were past tmi here haha)
LOOOOTS of pressure, she really is really low
CANT PEEE idk if its her head blocking or what but i really almost cant empty my whole bladder
a little crampy but no contractions yet =( i walked and bounced for hourssss so shell come when shes ready =)
lots of pressure in my lower back too so i guess well see tomorrow how things turn out


so here is hopefully my last belly picture and soon will be ellie pictures hehehe

 

Appreciate life as it is!!

Man ive been such a debby downer the past 2 weeks its just been depressing! what happened to the happy cassie?!?! I'll tell you what happened! I let my circumstances in the world run my emotions rather than believing God for all that He can do. I have a house and food in my fridge and an AMAZING husband who takes such good care of me and this beautiful baby girl in my belly that will be here soon, so why am i so hung up on the bad stuff? I usually handle stress pretty well but when everything started to fall apart at once i think i went into overload haha When my car broke down and joshs truck broke down and we lost all sense of independence, having to rely on family to go anywhere just really hit me hard. Not being able to just go where ever, whenever i want is not the happiest thought. Not that i ever really went many places when I had a car haha but just the thought of having it here was enough security, but now any time i want to go grocery shopping, to church, any time i need to get something to prepare for ellies arrival or anything along those lines I have to rely on some one else to get me there and hassle them. Ive always been extremely independent and having both vehicles break and spending every last penny we have on trying to fix the truck just to find out its too far gone really hit hard not to mention all the faith and prayer i put into getting that truck running, watching day by day go by and my poor husband out there in the heat working his heart out from morning till night can really tear a person down. Then our cell phone bill comes up and as i said before every last penny was put into the truck so i now have no communication with the outside world other than my dear computer. 
  So I'm going to be honest, I lost a lot of faith when i was sooo sure that me laying hands and praying over that truck would work and it didnt. Then as most of you know i got sick and my ears got plugged so it was extremely hard to hear anything and I had to read everyones lips for the most part until they unpopped last night but once again for 2 weeks straight i prayed and prayed it'd go away and once again I kept looking at my circumstances in the world and getting more discouraged. BUT GOD!! but God is forgiving and is patient while He knows I have growing and learning to do, He continues to take care of my little family although I complain and get restless and upset over everything thats going on around me. It truly has been a struggle to stay happy and I just woke up this morning wondering why I would let such silly things bother me, KNOWING my God is waaay bigger than that! If were going through something HE WILL pull us through and get us through this so why would I ever worry about it?? I'm just glad i wasnt too far gone to realize all this, i mean i can stop looking at the no car situation as me losing independence and more as getting closer to family and allowing them to bless us, hoping that some day we'll be able to bless them 10 times as much =) and josh not having much work but getting some here and there has been nice to have him around, it would be muuuch worse without a vehicle or a phone stuck at home 9 months pregnant if I didnt have my best friend to talk to and spend time with every day. 
I really am shocked at how discouraged i let myself get, forgetting how awesome of a God i serve, the one who sent His only son to DIE on the cross for ME! the one who brought josh into my life, the one who gave me the dream telling me that everything was ok, i would get pregnant with a baby girl and to name her luella rose but call her ellie (come to find out ellie was joshs grandmas nickname!) the one who provides every need we have, we may not be rich but we are NEVER hungry and never cold, the one who has ALL the answers even when i dont even realize i have a question. I could go on forever and ever but I guess i really just needed to write this all out because ive just been snippy and mean and cranky lately and there are NO excuses for that kind of behavior so this is my appology to every one reading this. Thank you for being a part of my life and please forgive my selfish acts 
THE HAPPY CASSIE IS BACK =D

I WON!!!

so the give away that i entered on honey pie accessories blog for the under cover tanks, i won it! sooo excited! I cant wait to be able to use it. Itll make it sooo much easier to breast feed discretely in public =) when i get it and AFTER ellie comes out hehe ill take pictures wearing it so any of you other breast feeding moms can see how awesome it is =D I love winning giveaways hehe

on a side note....Im in Albany for a conference that was going on, left on Wednesday morning and will be returning today, on Friday =) and had quite the scare last night, i kept having what i guess were contractions, it felt like i had poop cramps or something haha but i didnt have to poop! through out the day i was very active and in the heat and sun all day playing mini golf then at the pool, Im thinking it just did a toll on me causing me to have contractions. I drank some water and laid down and they slowly went away but boooy did they hurt, right from the bottom of my belly to my butt haha and of course it would happen when we're out of town =P
Before we left I told josh i should bring my hospital bag just in case and hes like nooo we wont need it hahah
so thats my big news and updates for today...not sure if anyone even reads any of this stuff but its still fun to write it all out i guess. Time to go get ready to head home!

WE GOT THE CRIB!!!

ellies room is now COMPLETE and i sooooo just want to fast foward to when she is here, now that everything is ready for her!!! now that i have everything time will probably go by sooooo slooow but anyways heres a picture of the crib!!! =D

our wall sticker tree =D

so i added a picture earlier showing what i ordered but here it is, hubby working hard to make it look nice for our baby girl =D hopefully i can get some more wall stickers to make her room more pink and girly hehe i wanna get some jungle themed animals that i saw on amazon...we shall seee =D

9 months for reeeaaal???

so i jussstt realized i turned 9 months preggo last monday! thats sooo crazy to me, ill be holding and cuddling and smooching my baby girl this month! soooo excited!! I got the whole house cleaned and found a crib today for $60 hopefully i can find a ride to go get it tomorrow before some one else gets it cause that is RIGHT in my price range with #30 bucks to spare!!! theres still other little things i need to get before she gets here and i know time is closing in but i really need to get this crib so its off my mind!! really hoping i can get a jogger but thats not something i NEED cause i do already have a stroller but oh well lets take it one step at a time =D oh yes andddd i dont think i mentioned this yet...my last sono has been scheduled for june 14th at 1:00!!! cant wait to see our beautiful baby girl right before she comes =D been taking the evening primrose oil (epo) and drinking red raspberry leaf tea, not sure if its working but well see the only thing that has for sure brought on regular contractions has been "the deed" hehe sorry if tmi but deal with it =D but then they go away after a while so im assuming when time is right and shes ready to come that, doin it will just get it started haha

heres a beach picture of my big ol 9 month belly hehehe
we went to the beach on memorial day it was sooo fun and a nice relaxing day!!

undercover tanks!!!

so just found out about these awesome undercover tanks for breastfeeding!!! they totally look like a life saver and waay easier and discrete! Honey Pie accessories is doing a giveaway and hopefully ill be the lucky winner cause as we all know money is tight but anything cute and convenient is wellll worth it! Check out the give away and all the info about the under cover tanks made by undercover mama http://honeypieaccessories.blogspot.com/2011/05/undercover-mama-review-giveaway.html#comment-form